That was a long break

Wow, I almost for got I even had this blog.

We'll skip ahead, shall we?

Colin freaks out when Drew is not in his sight, usually in the house. He's good at school, but once they're both home, Colin goes crazy if Drew goes out without him.

So, imagine the bravery it took to send Drew to Disney World with his mom.

I stayed home, and held my breath.

Monday morning, 4:30 am, Drew says goodbye to Colin, he takes off with him mom and grandmom, and Colin goes on a 20 minute grand mal tantrum, punching himself, me, throwing crap, jumping up and down making the house shake.

Finally, he wanted some cheese curls (is there anything cheese curls don't cure?), and some juice, he went back to bed with his iPod, and he was fine for the next few hours, and fine when I took him to school.

When I picked him up that afternoon afterschool and took him home, I expected another tantrum, but surprisingly, he was good.

But...

When it was bed time, he started all over again. He typed on his iPod "I want door Drew!) He wanted Drew to come through the door. I kept explaining to him, no, not til Thursday, but it got worse as I put him in bed, tantruming, thrashing hitting himself on the head, hitting me on the head.

Finally, after a long 15-20 minutes, I left him alone, he yelled for a bit, then finally he came out of his room. I met him at the top of the steps and he handed me the T-shirt he wanted me to put on him, and he handed me his iPod that said. "I want fruit punch."

OK, so I got him juice, he went back to bed with the iPod, and pretty much quietly went to sleep.

Ok

Tuesday morning, I woke him up for school, he was fine with that, and I just dropped him off.

So, let's see what happens bed time tonight.

The Big Snip 2

So, after you get snipped, they hand you a little plastic cup and tell you to come back in three months -- and fill the cup. If you know what I mean.

And the nurse said, "And make sure it's a fresh sample. Not parking-lot fresh, but fresh."

So three long months later, I'm working on filling the cup, playing Barry White, bigboobies.com on the computer .. and.. it kind of takes the fun out of it when you're aiming into a little cup.

I dropped off my little cup, how embarrassing is that? And they call me the next day. They found one rogue little swimmy! "Come back in a month."

d'oh!

So I wait another month, fill another little cup, and due to some scheduling mishap (on their part) the office is closed! Bastards!

I call them up, make a new appointment for a week later. Fill another cup (it's getting easier), drop that off. They call the next day.

"Um, your sample wasn't big enough."

What do I have to do??

OK, another appointment for the next week is made.

I'm on extrabigboobies.com, and I spend an hour, and of course kelli calls half way through, "What are you doing?"

"What do you think I'm doing?"

"I thought yo'd be done by now."

"No, I'm going to fill the entire cup."

"Oh."

"But, while you're  on the phone, can you talk dirty? Tell me what you're wearing."

I filled that cup, dropped it off, and the next day, got the all clear.

What a pain in the balls!

and they're off...

Both monkeys in school for full days, oh thank god. I can finally sleep. Colin is kind of benign, though he does run down the hall when we're leaving. Drew though, I'm sure will be running the joint in about six-weeks

busy day

Drop off Colin at school, drop off Drew at camp, an hour nap, pick up Colin at school, take him to doctor appointment, get home in time to pick up Drew at camp, leave Drew with babysitter, take Colin to occupational therapy, have 45 minutes in waiting room to nod off and make faces at cute baby, back home, out again to pick up dinner.

Am anxiously waiting for the boys to get their own drivers licenses, I have about 11 years.

Worst business model ever

I was heading to my then-girlfriend's house, and dropped by a florist to get some flowers.

And the woman behind the counter said, "We don't have any."

Lessons from marriage

The first thing you learn when you're married is you've been emptying the dishwasher wrong for years. In fact, you've been emptying the dishwasher so wrong it's amazing you haven't accidentally killed yourself in  a dishwasher-related injury.

The incredible Journey

bells, whistles

The steering column of my Town & Country was making this ungodly whine last December. The mechanic said, we can put a band-aid on it now, but in a few months you're going to need $900 in repairs and it will take two days.

Ugh.

So, in the spring we got it done. The next month the engine light comes on, bing! Another $700. Kelli is saying, "That's it, next time something goes wrong, you're trading it in."

Though I never agree with her on anything, this time she was right.

So, last weekend, she piles Colin, Drew, Taylor and Noah, and her mom in the minivan to go the swim club, and the power steering is making the same noise as before.

Crap!

So she had to move everyone, and everything into her Rav-4, and the Town & Country sat outside for a few days until my day off when I could trade it in.

So I'm driving up the boulevard, the car making that ungodly whining, and I'm thinking, 'I hope this thing makes it!' I'm about 2/3rds on my way when, bing, the battery light pops on.

Shit! I thought for sure I'd be calling the dealer from the side of the road. Come and get my trade in.

But I somehow made it. And traded it in for a Journey. After all the paperwork is signed, the salesman is pulling up in the minivan next to the Journey so I can clean out the minivan one last time. And there's this look on his face as he's hearing the engine. And I said, "too bad, it's yours now! You're stuck with it."

Anyway, the Journey has been great, Kelli loves all the bells and whistles.